SILENCE- Girl's loudest scream!

It’s good to be back…

Beshy 💞

queersforsimonspier:

Hi 👋🏼.

I just wanted to make something clear. I am manic right now (yes, I am mentally ill. Yes, I have bipolar).

I’ve noticed I’m starting to comment on a lot of things that I usually would not have, saying things I definitely would never say. I realize it once I get a glimpse of clarity, although those moments are few and far between anymore.

I’m also posting things that I normally would not have, and then I delete it. One, because right now I’m extremely paranoid. And two, because half the time, I don’t want people to see how bad I am (once again, when the moment of clarity comes and I realize what I’ve done).

I’ve been fighting this illness for 6, almost 7, years. And it is getting the best of me this time around. I’m trying to get my doctor to listen to me, but since it’s the holidays, I don’t know how well it’s going to work.

I just wanted to let you know that I do realize I have been acting odd and doing things that are unusual for me (in the moments I have clarity). I’m trying to keep a hold on it, but this illness is winning so far.

To those of you who have continued to stick around through all of this, thank you. It means so much to me. And I’m trying really hard to get better. I don’t know when that’ll be, and my illness will probably do more talking before I can get it under control.

If you leave, I understand. If you stay, thank you. ♥️

intactbrainbrokenheart:

“I fought hard for him for a long time Being there whenever he needed even when he wasn’t there for me Hearing excuse after excuse of how he did love me but was too messed up How he wasn’t good enough All the reasons of why we couldn’t be together And I accepted the excuses and held on because I loved him But there comes a point where you realize love isn’t enough when you’re the only one fighting”

— sometimes love isn’t enough || melindacarolinee (via melindacarolinee)